Thursday, 28 March 2013
So it's been a really really really long time since I've updated here. I said I'd update when things were all settled, but guess what.. we're still waiting on paperwork. Everything's taking a lot longer than we, or I initially thought it would take. At first we were supposed to here back in December, then it became January and February and still no word. So we ended up calling up to immigration, and were told we shouldn't expect anything until March/April. March is pretty much over, and we still haven't heard anything, and I've honestly given up hope about hearing anything any time soon. Last time I checked they're still processing paperwork that was applied by people in July 2012, and since we didn't apply our paperwork until September 2012, it'll probably still be a while. So for the past half year I've pretty much been playing housewife. I honestly can't complain, and I don't mind it,but I wouldn't mind going out and get a job. The work permit that I have doesn't mean much when you can't drive anywhere, because there's nothing within walking distance here.
Besides the paperwork, things are going pretty good. I still miss my family, especially my nephews, but I don't cry about it anymore when I think about them. Since October my mom's visited, we've added a stray cat to our small family, didn't have a Christmas tree up for the first time in 25 years, one of my Dutch friend who lives here now got married, spend valentines day with someone for the first time in my life, have slowly been rearranging and decorating the house making it a home and had my very first pregnancy scare. Big emphasis on scare, not sure I could handle a baby right now. So in all, a lot but not a lot has happened in the past couple of months.
Time's flying by despite not being to be able to do a lot, and hopefully it'll become spring soon, as in warm weather spring! I'm tired of the winter cold. If I remember correctly, same time last year, it was a lot warmer than this, even in the Netherlands. It's almost April already! Speaking of which, that means my oldest nephew's birthday is coming up. He'll turn 4 and it'll be the first birthday I've missed. He's starting kindergarten in May, and I just can't believe he's already turning 4. I still remember the day he was born, holding him for the first time, and now he's this non stop talking, dancing to girl bands, train and car loving 4 year old. Where has all this time gone?! It still makes me sad I'm no longer a part his daily life and not being able to see him grow up, But I guess we can't always have it all.
On a more brighter note, one of my Dutch friends is going to Orlando, Florida next month and our other friend and I who live here are going to visit here for a couple of days! I'm SUPER excited to go and get some sunshine, god knows how much I need it. We're leaving the hubbies at home so it'll just be the three of us. God knows I need a little bit of girl time with my own friends too.
That's about it. Maybe we'll hear back about the paperwork this coming April, or maybe not. Only time will tell I guess, but I know better than to get my hopes up now.
Thursday, 25 October 2012
about 3 months now that I've been here. Things are going okay. We're still waiting on the paperwork. I've had to have my biometrics taken to be able to continue the process, and now we're hoping to hear back in December. Been practicing driving for a little bit but now it turns out I won't be able to get my driver's license until I get my permanent residency. Which kind of put a damper on things, because it means I'll be stuck in the house for at least another month and a half. I'm also not excited about the fact that I'll have to take my driving test in the middle of winter..
On a brighter note, one of my friends is coming to NYC, and I'll get to make a little trip to go see her in November which I'm pretty excited about. Also, my mom's coming over for Thanksgiving and will get to meet in-laws. It'll definitely be interesting. Still not sure how I feel about my mom coming over, but we'll see how it goes.
Overall things are good. I'm still happy I'm here, with Jim, and things are going well. But sometimes I'm hit with waves of sadness, not being able to be with my nephews. Or being able to see my friends and brother's and sisters, especially my younger brother and sister. We were pretty close and hung out/see each other on a weekly basis. And my nephews, I knew I'd miss them, but not this bad. I cry almost every time after I've skyped with them, or just thinking about my nephew not wanting to see me because he's mad at me for leaving. It hurts. I guess it's just something I'll have to get used to and live with. Maybe I'm just overly attached to them. Babysitting them since they were born, 3-4 days a week, they did feel a little like my own.
Oh! I might have talked Jim into getting a cat...! This is how I know my hubby loves me.. he never wanted a cat, now we might be getting one! (And he also tried my Dutch mayonnaise, even though he HATES mayonnaise) If we're getting a cat, we're getting one from the Humane Society. Maybe I've been watching too many Animal Planet shows, but I like the idea of giving a cat another chance after, living the rest of its life in peace after having gone through hurt and/or neglect. I've always had cats growing up, and I didn't think I'd miss having them around, but I kind of do.
I'll leave it at this for now. More updates to come if anything exciting happens =o
Friday, 24 August 2012
So I've been here for a little over a month now. So far things are good. The first three weeks were crazy busy, buying new bedroom furniture, clearing out the guestroom, which had turned into a storage room, and actually set up a guestroom for when my brother and sister would get here, Jim's grandmother passed away, may she rest in peace, the funeral. Then the week when my brother and sister were here, we did Boston, NYC, hiking, mall visits, pretty much up and about every day. And then of course our wedding day =] Which was a stress full day even though we kept it small. Out of all the days, it decided to pour down the entire day, but luckily it cleared up for an for the ceremony (it started raining again after we left and headed to the restaurant). After my brother and sister left we headed to Maine to spend a couple of days with his friends who rented a house up there, something we planned last year, hoping I'd be there in time. All in all it's been a crazy busy four weeks.
Jim having to go back to work, and me not being able to work and staying at home, brought us back to reality. I sat down to go through all the paperwork that we still need to send in. I think I spent an entire day collecting everything, reading up on every form to make sure we're sending in the right things. And then there's the cost of everything, there's having to get a social security number, which we're doing this coming Monday, when he's working from home. There are so many things that we still need to do, and I don't consciously feel stressed, but I can tell that I am, because I have been having trouble sleeping at night, waking up every hour, tossing and turning and just unable to sleep. In turn, the lack of sleep makes me feel aggravated and resulting in me me acting all snippy. Now that things are kind of starting to take shape I'm sleeping a little better.
I don't really miss my family yet. I've been away longer than this before. The only ones I do miss A LOT are my nephews, and I've spent some time crying about it. We Skype sometimes, and it's so hard when my youngest nephews reaches his arms up to the screen, wanting for me to pick him up, or when the oldest one refuses to see me because he's mad at me for leaving. Most of the days I'm fine, I put the feelings in a box and shove them away, but sometimes I allow myself to think about it and it still upsets me every time. My mom (intentionally or unintentionally?) guild-tripping me about it when we Skype does not make it easier either. I feel like crap every time we Skype and it makes me not want to Skype with her either, which is like a double-edged sword, because if I don't, I don't get to see my nephews either. Oh.. and they managed to kill one of my fishes within three weeks of me being gone.
I have no regrets about moving here, this is where I want to be and Jim is who I want to be with, but it did come at the cost of a lot things that I know I will miss. One of the things I'm already missing is my independence, financially, socially and just being able to go around places. I know this is a temporary thing but it's still hard. There is no public transport here, so I'm literally stuck in the house all day. Which on most days if fine, I find ways to keep myself busy, but on some days hard, because I'd love to just go out, explore the area by myself, or just go for a coffee/lunch/dinner, and then realize I don't have any of my friends here to grab a coffee/lunch/dinner with. Yes I've been longer away than this before, but in the back of my head I always knew it wasn't permanent, which makes a world of difference.
But this isn't a permanent situation either. I know I'm not going to be out of a job forever, and that within the next two months I'll probably be driving too, being able to move freely. In the end I'm just still adjusting to everything; It really only has been four weeks which isn't a lot. We'll see where things stand another month from now. Things can only get better =]
Tuesday, 31 July 2012
I found out that one of my old high school classmates passed away. We weren't best or close friends, but friends nonetheless during our high school years that we were in the same class. We didn't keep in contact after high school, but I followed her on Facebook, reading her articles (she became a freelance journalist, working for two of the bigger news platforms back in the Netherlands), and see her transform from the quiet, slightly overweight girl, to a, still quiet, but beautiful woman, starting a very promising career.
She passed away in her sleep, at the way too young age of 24. She wasn't suffering from any diseases, she was a healthy young woman reaching the peak of her life, and just like that she's gone. There is no logical explanation as to how, or why it happened (yet), and I was shocked. I was sitting on the couch reading it and started crying. It's just so immensely sad, when she still had her whole life in front of her. Just another realization that death is not limited to old aged, sick and terminally ill people, and that our time on this world is only borrowed until our time is up whenever that might be.
In Memoriam: Ikram Akachaou Achaffaye (1988-2012). May she rest in peace, and may her family and friends find the strength to carry on after this sad and immense loss.
Monday, 23 July 2012
I have moved. I flew in Saturday evening, with Iceland air. I ended up flying business class, because the round-way ticket was the same price and a one-way ticket. Except that I was allowed to bring a TON more luggage. So I figured I'd get more value for my money buying the one-way business class, and bring pretty much all my things, than buy the round-trip, only being allowed bringing half of what I brought, and wasting half of the ticket by not using it.
The flights were both relatively short, from Amsterdam to Reykjavik 3 hrs, and from Reykjavik to Boston 5 hrs. I landed at 6.30, and was a little nervous about going through customs, because of course I was totally imagining things to be a lot more complicated than the turned out to be. All I had to do was fill out a standard immigration form, and hand in my sealed envelope, and that was it! It still took a good 30 mins to get through the lines and pick up my plus sized suitcases (+60lbs each). I was awaited by Jim with a huge bouquet of roses, and we took off for our 2hr ride home.
I have to say, that for the past two weeks, I feel like I've been witnessing my own life go by as a spectator. The fact that I've moved halfway across the world has not really sunk in yet. It's the weirdest feeling. Not sure what it is. Maybe because it already felt like home. Even just the airport. I've been flying into Boston Logan, almost, at least once a year for probably the past 6-7 years. I'm still seeing the same people at the customs booths from 6 years ago, there are at least 7 faces I recognize, it's just all so familiar. I guess the weirdest feeling is that I don't have a deadline until when I'm allowed to stay. I don't have to go back anymore, and it's okay for me to be, and stay here. It's been a long 8 months going through the entire process, but it was definitely worth it.
Two weeks from now, my younger brother and sister are flying in, because Jim and I are getting married. We have a 90 day window to get married, but figured we might as well do it as soon as possible, to finish up the rest of the paperwork. We're planning to redo our marriage next year, for our families, so my family will have time to save up money to fly in, so this year's we won't make a big deal out of it. I'm still very happy to have my brother and sister there, and I might even have a friend fly over who's staying in Austin, Texas right now.
I've been here for a day now, and it really did feel like coming home. It was a pretty good day. We got up early, and had breakfast at a local diner we always go to, went out for some grocery shopping, before heading to his mom's. It was a picnic to celebrate his birthday, which we totally forgot to do, because we were all so focused on my arrival. His nieces and nephews were there, and I met a couple more family members whom I hadn't met before.
Today will be a pretty quiet day. Jim's working from home, and I'm about to start unpacking once I finish this up. After work, we'll head out to a furniture place, and look at some things, we're looking for a new bedroom set. One; because I don't like his bed, and is due for replacement anyway, and two; he doesn't have enough storage place for all my clothes.. I've already taken up half his closet last time I brought half of my things over, and I still have A LOT more to unpack. We'll also have to drop by a jewelry store at some point this week, to look at wedding bands, because our date is coming up pretty soon, too. There are actually a lot of things that still need to be done, but we'll cross those bridges when we get there. =] For now this is it.